No Looking Back
by Jillian1
Summary: *FINAL CHAPTER UP!*Mulder and Scully spend a long weekend skiing in Vermont, where they end up confronting their feelings for each other. There’s no case involved, just a vacation, some angst, and romance--FLUFF!! No real substance. ;-)
1. Default Chapter

****

TITLE: No Looking Back

****

AUTHOR: Jillian

****

FEEDBACK: Of course! My e-mail is JILLIBEAN@aol.com if you wanna send me something nice. Or mean. Whatever, it's all good. Oh, and review me here at the fabulous fanfiction.net, my second home.

****

RATING: PG-13 for "adult themes." You know, *raises eyebrow* the good stuff.

****

SPOILERS: Eh, everything up to X-Cops. Special things to remember are Millennium, Triangle, um, yeah, shippy episodes. 

****

TIMEFRAME: Takes place after the case they go on in X-Cops. Which is mid season seven, in the winter.

****

ARCHIVE: If you'd like, you can archive it when I'm done posting it all. Please let me know, so I can go look at it. : )

****

DISCLAIMER: I don't won them, and I never ever will. But, since Chris and the guys at 1013 and FOX don't let them have any fun, I took em on a little field trip to go skiing. No copyright infringement intended. Suing me will be pointless, because I have nothing.

****

SUMMARY: Mulder and Scully spend a long weekend skiing in Vermont, where they end up confronting their feelings for each other. There's no case involved, just a vacation, some angst, and romance. Please read!

****

AUTHORS NOTES: Okay, ever since I went skiing up at Killington in 2001, I've been looking for a fanfics to write that takes place up there. So, I decided to write this. The descriptions are pretty accurate, as I was just there in December 2002. I had lots of fun, and if you're looking for a good ski resort, stay at Killington, more particularly at Pico. It's lots of fun. If you get a ski instructor named Doug, however, run. Run very fast. He's a weirdo. There's a character based on him later on, named after him. I'll give you more funny details on that in a later authors notes. Oh, and um, this story wasn't going to be chaptered, but it's a ploy to get more reviews. So review! And enjoy ;-) Oh, and the story switches POV's.

* * * * * 

I walked into the office, seeing Mulder sitting behind his desk. He was on the phone with someone, and I listened in to his conversation. "Uh huh, okay, great. Sure. Thanks a lot. I'll see you tonight then." He hung up. 

"Mornin', Scully." He said.

"Who was that?" I asked, snippily. I didn't realized how jealous the words sounded until they came out of my mouth. Not that I had a right to be jealous...

"Byers." He said.

"Oh." I replied. "What did he have to say?" I asked, the jealousy in my voice turning to curiosity.

"Scully, have you ever gone skiing?" Mulder asked.

"No, I haven't. What's that got to do with anything?"

"Well, Byers and the guys rented this big condo in Vermont for President's Day Weekend. They were going to go skiing, the place is right on the slopes, but they can't go. They're going to some Computer Convention in Manhattan."

"And..." I encouraged.

"And, they have nobody to take the condo. So, he offered it to me. I said I'd take it. I was wondering if you'd like to go with me... It's a big place, two bedrooms, big bathroom... Access to a pool and gym, and all paid lift tickets. We even get a free lesson." He grinned.

"I don't know... I've never gone skiing before." I hesitated. Why am I hesitating? A non-business weekend with Mulder... I should be jumping at the chance. Inside, I'm afraid of what I really want.

"I have, once. It was a long time ago, my whole family was still together... It's not hard. You'll have a lesson, and I'll teach you."

Well, this could be fun.

"Okay, I guess I could go." I replied simply. It was about a week until President's Day Weekend, and I knew the Bureau would be happy to have us out of here for a while. 

"Great. We'll rent skis up there... Just pack lots of warm clothes. We can take off work Friday and Monday. We'll leave here Thursday night, the Gunmen had the condo that night too. I guess we'll drive, being that Vermont doesn't have any airports near the skiing area... Or any airports at all, really. It's a whole bunch of nothing." He grinned.

I nodded, and pondered this situation. I was going to live in a condo with Mulder for four days. Thursday night, Friday night, Saturday night, and Sunday night. Four days. I was nervous. I was actually nervous! This is silly. It's just Mulder. Yeah, just my partner. Just my best friend. Just the man I'm in love with. Oops. Did that slip out? I keep trying to not admit it to myself, but it's true. I know I love Mulder. There's nothing I can do about it now. I tried for a *long* time to make myself not love him, but it's impossible. Beyond being impossible to stop loving him, it's infuriating *to* love him. One minute he's ditching me, the next he's taking me out to play baseball. We kissed on New Year's Eve, and that was only a little over a month ago. We actually kissed! I mean, it wasn't a *real* kiss, but it was a *kiss*. Not really a friendship kiss. This weekend could be when my feelings for Mulder come out... He told me he loved me, but there's a difference between loving someone and being *in* love with them. Was he *in* love with me?

I didn't realize I was staring aimlessly until he made a face at me. It was one of those 'what's so interesting?' faces. I quickly looked towards the file in my lap. It was Tuesday. I had two days until I got to spend a long weekend with Mulder at a ski resort. What would it be like to live with him? I'd gotten a brief taste when we went undercover in California. He was a typical guy: messy, annoying, funny, fun to be around... He was everything all rolled into one incredibly attractive package. A package I wanted to tear open.

Of course, we were just friends. Best friends, yes, but nothing more. We hung out like friends, we went to grab a burger and a beer at Casey's Bar and Grill like friends, he looked out for me like a friend... Mulder was always there for me when I needed him. When I was battling cancer, when I lost Emily, and more recently when Donnie Pfaster paid me a surprise visit. I was ashamed at how afraid I was, but Mulder never made me feel like a less of an Agent for being afraid of Pfaster. I hate being afraid of anybody, and I usually wasn't--but Pfaster was an exception. Of course, after it all, who was there to give me a place to sleep and help me clean my apartment in the morning? Mulder. My best friend. Friends. Just friends, right?

Then what the Hell was that kiss about? It's still fresh in my memory. It was so perfect. The ball dropped, everyone was waiting for the world to end (despite the fact that the *real* millennium was still a year away..) and he leans in to kiss me. Meanwhile, the television is showing hundreds of people scream and cheer and clap; it's almost as if they were clapping for us. I felt so wonderful, so utterly happy. He wished me a happy New Year and we walked off together, his arm around me. Not to mention the "I love you," thing. What was I thinking? "Oh, brother." There you go, the man I love tells me he loves me, and I say "Oh, brother." Smooth, Dana, smooth. Of course, there was the almost-kiss in the hallway, when I thought I was transferring to Salt Lake City. New Years was different, though. It was the first time there was any romantic contact of any kind when Mulder *didn't* think I was leaving, sick, or dying.

I shake myself out of my daydreaming when I realize I've been staring at the file for five minutes and haven't read a thing. It was paperwork for our last case, when the COPS crew had followed us around. It seemed like things got stranger and stranger for Mulder and I. This daydreaming was insane, it wasn't like me. I'm more controlled than that, I never daydream about *anybody*. Why was Mulder the exception to that rule? Why didn't I have the courage to tell him I loved him? Why was it all of a sudden mattering? Because I was about to spend a long period of time alone with him, not on a case? That must be it. I tried not to think about it, but I knew it would take effort.

What would take more effort, however, would be not dying of suspense between that moment and Thursday evening.

****

* * * * *

I'm sitting in the car with woman who is more important to me than anyone in the world. I'm going to be in this car with her for about nine hours. The woman beside me in this car is Dana Katherine Scully. Dana Scully agreed to spend a non-business related weekend with me. There really is a God.

Actually, I don't know why I'm so surprised. I knew she'd come with me. I don't mean to sound pompous, but I know Scully and I are best friends. I love her, I'm in love with her, and I love being with her. My intentions this weekend are nothing but honorable, and they always were. Don't get me wrong, there hasn't been a day in years that I haven't wanted my intentions to be dishonorable. I could never disrespect Scully, I would have to wait until I was sure she wouldn't be offended. She never actually told me she loved me, so who was I to assume she did? What if I told her I was in love with her and she didn't feel the same way? Things would be awkward and I'd lose my best friend. I'd lose my everything.

Of course, we kissed on New Year's Eve not too long ago. It was a kiss, the fireworks kind of kiss. I mean, it wasn't a passionate kiss, but it wasn't a friend kiss. Our lips lingered together for a long time... It was amazing. It was powerful, and it was just a New Years kiss on the lips. I can barely imagine how powerful a *real* kiss with Scully would be... How amazingly powerful making love to her would be...

I realize I haven't said anything in a while. We're exiting DC now. It's a Thursday, and it's noon. We cut out of work early, being the rebels that we are. We should be in Vermont by nine o'clock at night if we don't get lost. I look over at her briefly, before looking back to the road. She looks happy, content, just sitting there. I look again and catch her looking at me. She smiles faintly and looks back ahead of her. 

"So did you pack a lot of warm clothes?" I ask. Smooth Mulder. I sound like a mother. Next thing you know I'll yell at her to zipper up her coat and wear her scarf.

"Yes, I did. I even found a ski jacket at my Mom's house. Missy was into skiing for a while after college. It's hers... I couldn't find her skis, though. We're renting up there, right?" She asked.

"Yeah." I said. 

"I've never gone skiing... I'll bet you twenty bucks I land on my ass within twenty minutes of putting the damn things on." Scully smiled.

"C'mon, Scully, I'm sure you'll be good at skiing. If you have enough balance to run in those heels everyday, you should be able to handle skis just fine." I smile back.

I love to see Scully smile. I keep looking at her, because the smile lingered on her face. She looks beautiful, as always. She's wearing jeans, something kind of rare for me to see. She has on this blue, turtleneck sweater that brings out her eyes. We've been spending a lot of time together lately, as friends, just hanging out. I love spending time with her. Now that so many of my questions were answered, and I put my search for Samantha at rest, I can direct most of my attention elsewhere. What better place to direct that attention than right at Scully? 

****

* * * * * * 

Mulder and I switched places driving a while back. I'd been driving about four hours, when I reached Vermont. Mulder had fallen asleep beside me, and a little while after reaching Vermont, I woke him up. I wasn't really sure where I was going, and I needed him to navigate for me while I drove.

"Mulder," I said, trying to rouse him. "Get up."

"Mm," He murmured, opening his eyes. "Yeah, Scully?"

"I need you to help navigate to the mountain area." I said.

"Sure." He replied.

So, about forty-five minutes later, we pulled into a parking lot. The ski resort, Killington, had seven peaks. Six were all connected, and the seventh was a few miles down the road. That's where we were staying. It was a smaller mountain called Pico, but our lift tickets would work anywhere at the Killington resort. The condo was right off the slopes at Pico, and we had lessons scheduled for the morning.

"You head inside, Scully. Make sure the heat is on in the condo and I'll take in the stuff." Mulder said.

"Let me take something in." I protest, not wanting him to carry in all of my stuff.

"Scully, I got it, really. It's no big deal." He smiled.

"Okay." I shrug. "Which condo is ours?" Ours. I never thought I'd ask Mulder 'Which condo is ours?' It sounds like we're a couple...

"F-7." He says, pulling me out of my daydreaming.

"Okay." I say. 

I walk to the condo, admiring the surroundings. There's about a foot of snow on the ground, but the parking lot is plowed. There mountain peaks are visible, but none of the lifts are running since it's night time. It's a lot colder in Vermont than it was in DC, and I shove my hands in my coat pocket to keep warm. I'm suddenly very glad I packed a lot of warm clothing. I reach the condo, and fumble with the key Mulder had handed me. When I open it, I'm happy to find that the heat is on.

I realized then that I was very happy to be in a condo and not a cabin. Cabins, and snowstorms in general, bring back memories of my ex-boyfriend, Jack Willis. Don't get me wrong, I cared about Jack, and I really thought I loved him. I didn't realize then that I was just craving an authority figure, and my instructor at Quantico fit that description perfectly. I must say, I was happy to see him again, which was so long ago... Long before I knew how much I loved Mulder. When whatever happened to Jack happened, I didn't want to believe it. No matter how long it had been, I had cared about Jack. On our vacation, Jack and I did no skiing. He had other things on his mind... Things I was wishing Mulder would have on his.

I take off my coat and shoes, kicking the snow off of them. I walk inside the condo, admiring it. The first thing you see from where I've walked in is the laundry room. That takes you to a hallway. On the right is a bedroom, and then the hallway opens up on the left for the kitchen. It's not a big kitchen, but big enough. It has all the typical kitchen appliances, and there's a round wooden table to eat at. From there, it opens into a big living room with a pullout couch and a fireplace. On the right of the living room, there's a door leading into a bedroom bigger than the first one. At the far end of the house in the living room, there are sliding glass doors. They lead to a patio facing the ski slopes, and you can ski from the patio to the lift. The view is lovely, and you can see the entire mountain. I was looking out as I heard Mulder enter.

"It's a beautiful place, Mulder," I said, turning to see him. The condo isn't as beautiful as he is, though. He takes off his black leather jacket, and underneath he's wearing a black ribbed turtleneck. I always thought men in turtlenecks were sexy, but *Mulder* in a ribbed turtleneck... That's beyond sexy. It clings to his form, showing off how in shape he is. With that, the black jeans, and the jacket, he is definitely tall, dark, and handsome.

"Yeah, Scully, it is. Nice view." He nodded towards the sliding glass doors.

I help him with the luggage. He insists I take the larger bedroom, so I do. Besides the luggage, there is a bag of groceries. I'm surprised Mulder packed groceries, but very impressed. I open up the bag on the kitchen table and take out the contents. Hot chocolate mix. Marshmallows. Two bottles of wine. A six pack of beer. A can of coffee, and a box of tea bags. Milk. I took out the other assorted items along with it.

"At least there's something nutritious in here," I say quietly, to myself, as I take out the milk.

Mulder walked back out of his bedroom, and over to the table.

"You hungry, Scully?" He asked.

"Yeah, actually, I am." I said, not realizing it until he asked me.

"You want to order in something?" He asked.

"Sure, um, how about Chinese?" I ask. 

"Sounds good to me." He said. He looked around the condo and found a pamphlet with all the area restaurants menus. He found a nearby Chinese food place and called them up.

I sit down on the couch, and after he hangs up the phone he joins me. Casually, he flips on the television, channel surfing. After a while, he finds the science fiction channel. They're showing some B-Movie about aliens. 

"Oh yeah. Nothing like a movie with poor acting and special effects to end a long day of driving." Mulder smiled.

"See, now I would think you'd hate this stuff. It gives us a bad name." I said.

"Actually, I hardly ever watch alien movies anymore. It's no fun once you've seen 'em for real." He grins.

I watch as the couple on screen pulls up to a cliff in their car. The guy looks at the girl, a young blonde with bright blue eyes. He's trying to kiss her, but she keeps telling him she isn't sure about this. 

"This is *so* cliché." I smile. "She's going to listen to this guy, and start making out with him in the back-seat. Then, the aliens will come. They always wait until the couple starts making out to show up."

"Well then, maybe if we want proof of the existence of extraterrestrials, instead of chasing them around, we should just make out in my car down at Lover's Lane and wait for them to come to us." He teases, laughing quietly. I smile, trying desperately to think of a witty comeback. 

"If only it were that simple." I said, without really thinking. What the Hell compelled me to say that? I should have said something like 'You wish, Mulder.' Or something witty. He doesn't say anything back, just looks at me. 

"Maybe it should be." He finally says.

The knock at the door disrupts the moment.

****

* * * * * * 

What was I thinking? 'Maybe it should be?' What would I have done if the Chinese food didn't arrive right then? Would I brushed the stray strand of hair from her face and kissed her? Would I have chickened out and mumbled something about the movie? Well, needless to say, the Chinese food did arrive just then. I pay the delivery boy and bring it inside. She smiles at me, as if nothing happened.

"Smells good." She said.

"Yeah," I replied, taking out the food. She walks over to me, and arranges her food on a plate. I look over at the wine. Chinese food, wine, and a crappy alien movie. A winning combination!

"Wine?" I ask, pouring myself a glass.

"Yeah, please." She replied.

We sit down at the table and eat the food, making small talk about our last case. The entire time, I find myself staring at her as she eats. Watching her, looking contentedly at her eyes or her hair or her lips. Soon enough she's clearing the plates, leaving the wine glasses on the table.

"Okay, Mulder, so maybe the gay couple was funny, but the COPS crew was annoying." She says, referring to our last case. 

"C'mon, Steve and Edie made up for all of that. You should have seen your face when they started talking about their problems in the bedroom." I smiled.

"I was just afraid you weren't going to be able to hold in the laughter any longer." She said. "I could see it in your face, that you just wanted to laugh but you knew you couldn't."

"Oh, and you didn't want to laugh when they started crying?"

"Mulder! They were *crying*!" She said, in mock anger. "It's terrible to laugh at somebody else's misfortunes."

"Tell me you didn't want to laugh." I said again.

"Okay, so we're terrible people. Big deal." She smiles, walking back to the table. 

I fill both of our glasses back up to the top with wine. I take mine and head back to the couch, and Scully follows me. It's almost eleven o'clock now, and I'm growing tired. The movie is ending, and the kids have been returned from their adventure, rambling about bright white lights and tests.

"Mulder," She begins. "Thanks for inviting me." 

"Don't thank me." I said, smiling. "It's not like I have any other friends. Besides, I wanted to spend time with you." I said. Is this going to lead to another awkward moment?

"Yeah, I wanted to spend time with you, too." She said taking another sip of wine. I do the same.

"Well, I hope it's fun." I said.

"It's already fun." She said. 

"Yeah, you're right." I replied. 

"So, you still remember how to ski?" She asked.

"Um, not really. We'll take lessons together." I said. "Maybe I'll remember everything, maybe I won't." 

"You know what?" She asked. "Ever since Antarctica, when we were freezing out in the snow, I've hated the cold. Hated it. Hypothermia is *not* fun." She smiled.

"It's more fun than an alien virus, though." I teased.

"Yeah, you're right about that."

"So you came out in the cold anyway?" I ask.

"What are friends for, Mulder?" She asked, finishing her glass of wine. I had absent-mindedly finished mine too.

"That, was some good wine." Scully said. "I'm tired, Mulder." She smiles at me, and spends a while just looking at me. Finally, she gets up and heads towards the bedroom.

"'Night, Mulder. I'm glad you convinced me to come out in the snow." With a smile that I couldn't read, the enigmatic Agent Scully left the room.

When I could speak again, I called out a "Good night, Scully." to her. 

I turn my head to the snow falling outside the window. I can't wait until she's awake again.

* * * * * * 

Much more to come, I promise!  
-Jillian


	2. Chapter Two

****

Chapter Two

Authors Notes: I just want to address Teresa's question about the chapters. There won't be too many, but they'll all be rather long. The reason for this is because unlike "Tomorrow", it wasn't written in chapters, but as one entire story. The reason I broke it up is because it's rather long to read at once. It's also a ploy to get more reviews. Yeah, I'm evil like that. Oh, and by the way, the Doug mentioned herein is a real person, (who tried endlessly to get a date with my aunt) who was my ski instructor… I must say, I made him more attractive for this story. So, if Doug is out there and he's a fanfic reader, I want you to know my aunt was lying. She wasn't really in a relationship. We all just thought you were a tad bit weird. ;-)

****

* * * * * * *

I opened my eyes, and was suddenly startled to not be in my own bed. I smiled to myself, realizing I was in Vermont with Mulder. I looked out the window and saw snow falling, and I could smell Mulder cooking what I believed to be pancakes inside. Mulder, cooking? This was new, for me at least. The clock in the room told me that it was 9:15, and I rolled out of the bed. I put my robe on over my pajamas, which I had unpacked last night before going to bed. I wandered into the living room, and saw Mulder at the stove with a pan, a few dirty bowls, and a box of pancake mix.

"Morning, Scully." He smiled. He was wearing a pair of sweats and a tee shirt, and hadn't showered yet.

"Good morning, Mulder. You? Cooking?"

"It's been a while, but I think I managed to remember how to turn on the stove," He grinned.

"You didn't have to make breakfast." I said.

"It's no problem, Scully. We've got reservations for lessons at 11:00. We have to rent skis first, and then we each have a private lesson, courtesy of the Gunmen." Mulder said.

"Sounds great." I smiled and sat down at the table. 

Mulder finished the pancakes, and we ate. We made idle conversation about the weather and how beautiful Vermont is. When we finished eating, I insisted on cleaning up. I cleared the table and washed the dishes, while Mulder took a shower. By the time I was finished in the kitchen, he was finished in the shower. He had put on a turtleneck sweater and black ski pants, and his hair was still damp. 

"All yours, Scully." He said.

All I could think was, _*Oh, how I wish it was all mine.*_

I smiled a thank you to Mulder and took a quick shower. I kept telling myself I couldn't get worked up over Mulder on this vacation. Mulder I were partners, but more than that, best friends. Our friendship is something I would never want to compromise, because it's one of those few things I know will always be there. It's a constant, he's a constant... Whenever I need someone, I know he's there. Whenever I need something, I know he'll do it for me. All because I'd do the same for him. We're best friends... Still, I know I want more. I want to be romantically involved with him, and I have for a long time. I never thought anything of it early on, but now it seems like a possibility. He kissed me. Why won't he do it again?

I was ready to leave the condo by 10:30, so we had enough time to rent skis. I had on a pair of black ski pants, a heavy sweater, and a blue ski coat that used to belong to Missy. Underneath that, I had on a few layers of clothing to stay warm. I walked along with Mulder through the snow, looking at all the happy people skiing about. It couldn't be that hard to learn how to ski, right? I mean, how difficult could it be? I've got good balance, and I'm light. I should be good at this.

We rented our skis uneventfully and walked over to the lessons area. They grouped you according to experience. Now, since I had no idea how to attach the ski to the boot and whatnot, I was clearly in the beginners area. Mulder, however, insisted that he remembered the basics from being a small child. We were the only two people waiting for lessons, and there were two instructors there. 

"All right, welcome to Killington! My name's John, and, this is Doug." He introduced the other man beside him. "You folks have got private lessons, I understand?"

"Yes, that's right." Mulder said. "My name's Fox Mulder--call me Mulder, and this is Dana Scully."

"Okay, well, I'll be working with you, Mulder." John said.

"And, I'll be working with you, Dana." The other man smiled at me. He was about ten years younger than the first man, looking to be in his late thirties. 

Mulder went off with his instructor, who was going to take him up a small hill on the lift. My instructor, however, decided that we ought to work on the basic mechanics before I went up the lift. I was annoyed that Mulder and I were separated, but I knew he was stubborn and wouldn't be able to start at the beginning. I managed to click my ski boots into the skis, and glide after the instructor.

"So, Dana, your husband's got experience?" He asked.

"Oh, uh, he's not my husband, he's just a friend." I smiled. Just my only friend.

"Oh, I see. My name's Doug, by the way, if you missed it before." He flashed me a toothy grin. He had blonde hair and bright blue eyes. 

"Have you seen much of Vermont?" Doug asked, as he side stepped up the hill. He gestured for me to follow, and I did.

"No, actually, we just got here yesterday." I replied, making my way up the incline.

"It's a beautiful place, Dana. Maybe I can show you around."

"Oh, thank you, but we've got a lot planned."

"Okay." He smiled. "Alright, now, turn your skis. Not quite downhill, not yet. Okay, I want you to go down the hill, and when you want to stop and slow down, put the tips of your skis together to make a wedge shape. Don't let them cross, or you'll fall. If you do fall, stay still, and I'll come help you up." He grinned.

"Okay." I said, hoping I'd learn this quickly so I could ski with Mulder. 

I started downhill, doing just as he said. I made it to the bottom and stopped perfectly. He skied down after me, and said "Good job." I smiled, happy that I wasn't having any difficulty with skiing. We repeated this drill a few times, and each time it was easier and easier.

After I had finished skiing down for the fifth or sixth time, he came up behind me at the bottom of the little hill.

"Now I'm going to show you how to hold the ski poles." He said.

He put both of his arms around me from behind, and clasped his hand around my forearms. This didn't seem very necessary, as I was pretty sure how to hold a pole. I was just about to say something when I felt his breath on my neck. What was this guy doing? 

"Are you sure I can't take you out to dinner sometime while you're here?" He asked.

I shook his grip loose and turned my head to him.

"Yes, I'm very sure." I replied curtly.

"I don't even get a chance?" He asked, raising his eyebrow.

"Look, are you going to teach me to ski or not?" I asked, angrily.

"Fine, fine. Well, you can stop, so I'll take you up the smallest lift we've got."

"Okay." I replied, and I followed him, gliding on my skis. 

I was flattered by Doug's offers, but I wasn't looking to meet somebody here. Especially when I was with Mulder. Sure, Doug was good looking, but he wasn't... Mulder. I knew nothing about this man, and I wasn't looking for a vacation fling. I didn't need or want that right now. What I had to do for the moment was stop acting like a teenager and fawning over Mulder. It was ridiculous... It didn't matter what I felt for him. We were partners and best friends... Who was I to betray that? Who was I to love him?

I realized Doug and I were at the top of the lift, and he lifted the bar. I hadn't said anything to him in a long time, and I almost felt bad. Almost. I managed to ski down the little hill at the end of the lift and follow him to the top of the slope. I was excited about skiing, and proud that I'd taken to it quickly. Well, I actually hadn't done anything except stopping yet, but I was damn good at that. 

"All right, Dana, now, you want to traverse the hill, side to side, and not to gain too much speed. Why don't you follow me down half way, and then we'll regroup?" He asked. I nodded silently.

He made a path in the snow with his skis, just as he said, side to side across the hill. I followed, with effort, making all the "u" shaped turns. It was cold, and this was boring. I wanted to be with my friend, and I was stuck here with some ski instructor who was hitting on me. This weekend was not working out as I had imagined it. _Of course it isn't, Dana, _I told myself. _Your imagination had you in bed with Mulder, under the sheets_. _Stop it! Stop it right now! Skiing. Following the tracks. Concentrate on that. _Doug stopped and so did I.

"You're doing very good, Dana." He smiled. "Why don't you continue down the hill, and I'll watch from behind." The grin on his face was even bigger now.

"Yeah, I'll bet you will." I muttered, skiing down the rest of the way. _Breathe, Dana, breathe_. Soon the lesson will be over and you'll be with Mulder again, and you'll be happy.

Doug reached the bottom of the hill just after me. He looked me up and down, as if making an assessment. I was annoyed, cold, and bored with skiing already. Doug grinned again. He had an annoying grin, all his teeth flashed. They were big and white and annoying. He was obnoxious in everything he did, even his clothes were obnoxious. He had on these bright blue ski pants with a matching jacket. You couldn't lose him in a crowd if you tried. If it was possible, I would have separated myself from him a long time before we reached the bottom of that hill.

"You're doing *great* Dana. You must be a fast learner." He said. 

"Thanks." I muttered. 

"Now, why don't you get yourself over to the lift line, Ski Bunny?"

My jaw literally dropped.

"Did you just call me SKI BUNNY?" I asked, my voice growing rather loud.

"Whaaat, you don't like it? I thought it was cute, and therefore suiting." 

"You don't take a hint, do you?" I asked, trying to keep my cool.

"All right, all right, c'mon, Dana." He said.

I turned around and started gliding towards the lift line, and that was when it happened.

I felt Doug's hand make swift contact with my ass. 

I didn't notice Mulder at the bottom of an adjacent slope, and I wasn't able to stop myself before *my hand* made swift contact with Doug's face.

* * * * * *

Holy shit. Scully's ski instructor just slapped her ass. I haven't even slapped her ass! Who the hell does this guy think he is? How dare he lay a hand on her! I watched, from the bottom of an adjacent slope, as Dana Scully slapped her ski instructor in the face. She is *not* a woman to be reckoned with. I skied over to her as fast as I could, and I could see that she wass trying to get her skis off. She was frustrated and it wasn't making it easy. Soon, I was right next to her.

"Mulder," She begins, looking embarrassed.

"I saw everything." I said quietly, helping her get her boot out of the ski. The guy she slapped, her instructor, has just been standing there rubbing his cheek.

"Oh, God." Scully murmured. Does she think she looks bad for hitting this guy? As soon as she's got her skis, I pop mine off and march over to him.

"Who the Hell do you think you are touching her like that?" I demand furiously, up in his face. People are starting to stare.

"Look, I was just fooling around, okay?" The guy said, backing up on his skis.

"Just fooling around? Look, if she doesn't want you touching her, then you don't touch her! She's an employee of the federal government, and she should sue your sorry ass on sexual harassment! How DARE you treat her like just a peace of meat! How DARE you try and look at her that way!" I was screaming now. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Scully's face blushing. 

"Hey, hey, calm down, it's not like you're married. Your just her friend." 

Oh. No. He had no idea what he just started.

"It doesn't matter who I am!" I screamed. "I'm her best friend but that doesn't matter! It doesn't matter if I never met her! Leave her the hell alone, she doesn't want anything to do with you! You ever touch her again, pretty boy, and I'll break your legs!" I screamed, getting closer in his face. I was ready to keep screaming when I felt Scully's arm on my shoulder.

"Mulder, look, let's go, let's not waste time, I'm fine, it's okay," She was saying, noticing the crowd around us.

"The only reason I'm leaving you without killing you is because she asked me too." I muttered in his direction, and picked up my skis and then Scully's.

I walked off with Scully, and my instructor ran over to meet up with Scully's. This trip was not going at all as I had planned it too. In fact, I thought maybe on this trip I would tell Scully how I really feel about her. I know I'm going to tell her eventually--it's not going to go away. Now, she looks very angry, but almost upset, like she's going to cry. I walk her over to the ski lounge and put our skis on a rack with a bunch of others outside. 

"Let me buy you a hot chocolate?" I ask, smiling.

"Just as long as you don't try and slap my ass." She smiles back at me.

"Oh, I can't make any promises." I tease, and I place my hand where I always do, on the small of her back. She doesn't seem to mind and we walk inside the large ski lounge. I watch her walk ahead of me, her balance thrown off by the clunky ski boots. Her normal, graceful stride is more bumpy and interrupted, but everybody walks that way in ski boots.

We sit down and take off our coats, and I get both of us hot chocolates. We're sitting at a table, and it's nice to be inside from the cold. The place is noisy, with lots of people running around in loud ski boots. All of it is tuned out at our table, for me at least, as I watch her sip the hot drink. I haven't said anything in a while, and neither has she. She looks far off, like she's thinking, and she still looks pretty pissed.

"So, are you going to tell me what happened with the ski instructor?" I ask, trying to gently coax the story from her. 

"I lost it, Mulder. I shouldn't have hit him, I should have just walked away..." She began.

"What? Scully, if you hadn't hit him, I would have. He doesn't have the right..."

"No, Mulder, he doesn't. But I didn't have to hit him. I lost my cool." 

"Was this an isolated incident with him?" I ask, fairly certain it was not.

She pauses for a moment, and the lets out a breath. Finally, she says, "No, it wasn't. The entire time he'd been asking me to dinner, or trying to touch me one way or another. I just tried to ignore it, and then he called me a little ski bunny, or something, and when I turned around he slapped my ass and I lost it. I completely lost it, and I slapped him. He deserved it, yes, but I should've been able to keep my cool in front of all those people..."

"Yeah, and he should have been able to keep his hands off of you." I said. Can you really blame the guy? It *is* hard to keep your hands off of Scully... But unless you're me, hands off or I'll take them off for you.

"You okay?" I ask.

"Yeah, I'm fine. It's just, I wanted this to be a lot of fun, and I feel like I brought it down with this." She smiled weakly.

"C'mon, Scully, it isn't your fault you're irresistible, even to the jerks out there." I grin. Innuendo, man's best friend. I see her smile, and her breath catch in her throat. Maybe I'm on to something here.

"Even the jerks like you, Mulder?" She teases back.

Oh man, she knows exactly what buttons to push. "Even the jerks like me." I smiled back at her. Especially the jerks like me.

"So, how'd you make out on the slopes?" She asks, changing the subject.

"Pretty good. Didn't fall once, and made it down the whole slope. How about you?"

"Skiing, I was just fine." She smiled. "I learned how to stop and go down the hill, but that was when the lesson was cut off." 

"Well, there isn't much to learn besides stopping and going, Scully. I can take you up the hill I was on, if you can stop and go I think you can handle it. Besides, I'll be there to help you out." I said.

"Okay." She smiled. "Sounds like a good idea to me." 

We finish up the hot chocolate, and put our coats back on. We walk out of the ski lodge, and I realize I forgot how damn cold Vermont was. I walk over to our skis, and look to Scully. She smiled, and I suppose she's ready to give this skiing thing another try. She clicks on her own skis by herself, regaining her independence after I tried to fight a battle for her earlier. I click my skis on and we glide together towards one of the lifts.

I didn't say anything until we were on the lift. "This hill's bigger than the one you were on, but I don't think you'll have any trouble."

"As long as you're a better instructor than Doug, I think I'll be fine." She smiled.

"Well, in the respect department, I certainly hope so." I smiled.

"Look, Mulder, you didn't have to do that for me before... I could've handled Doug.."

"I know you could have." I assured her. "But I didn't do that because I chose too, Scully. He infuriated me, I snapped. I don't like to see someone I care about treated that way." 

"Thanks," She says quietly.

"Don't mention it, Scully. I would want you there for me if I was in your place."

"Don't worry, Mulder, when the women start smacking your ass, I'll be there to get in a catfight." She smiled.

"Now, *that* would be quite a sight." I grinned.

She laughed a little and said, "Inside, you're like the rest of them, huh Mulder?"

I grinned at her and asked, "Can you really blame me?"

We get off the lift at the top, and I see an unsure look on her face. I did just drag her up a mountain, telling her I'm *sure* she'd be able to ski down. She glances at me and sees I'm looking, and I look away. We get ready at the top of the hill, and I decided to take the lead.

"Okay, Scully, so you were able to stop and go, right?" I asked.

"Uh huh. The hill wasn't this steep though." She says nervously, accompanied by a weak smile.

"It's not that hard. Okay, um, well, you can follow me down, we'll go slow."

"I'm sure I'll be fine." She replied. Ah, she's realizing she's not the commanding one for once and it's bugging her. 

If there's one thing I know about Scully, it's that she likes to be in control. She does not like it when I plan autopsies for her, or ditch her, or tell her what to do. It makes her angry, and I do it anyway. Maybe it's just because of how beautiful she is when she's angry. It's true, she is beautiful angry. Almost as beautiful as when she laughs. Almost. You see, Scully has this great laugh, but she never uses it. I mean, she laughs occasionally, but it's always restrained laughs, this little breathy laugh. It's still cute (she'd kill me if she knew I thought something she did was 'cute') but it wasn't as good as her *real* laugh. I've only been privileged enough to see it a few times, but it's loud, and it's beautiful. It's this great chuckle, and I'd do *anything* to see her laugh like that. I decide mentally that by the time we get back to DC, I'm going to make Scully laugh, for real. A big, loud chuckle.

For now, though, I glance over my shoulder and see her make her way down the hill behind me. I let her get in front of my for the hell of it, and we progress down the hill. We're keeping a rather slow speed, and it's kind of boring. We speed up a little, and we're almost at the bottom of the hill when I see her skis cross. She realizes her mistake, and tries frantically to correct it. It's to late, and the skis lose control. She veers off to the side of the hill, which is thankfully pretty empty. I ski up behind her, hoping to be able to grab her and regain her balance, but before I can, her poles fly up in the air. She follows them, and lands right on her bottom.

"Scully!" I called, even though I was next to her. My skis were against the mountain and I was stopped beside her. She had an unbelievably frustrated look on her face.

"Mulder?" She asked.

"Yeah?"

"This sucks." She muttered.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"I'm fine, Mulder." 

"Are you sure? I could call the ski patrol,"

"I'm *fine*, Mulder." She insisted.

"Does your leg hurt?" I asked.

"I'm FINE, Mulder." She replied snippily again, almost shouting now.

"Hey, I was just asking." I replied defensively.

"You were just asking three times." She snipped. "I'm fine."

"Alright, let me help you up." I offer her my hand, and although I heard an annoyed sigh, she grabbed on. I pulled her up in one fluid motion, and nothing appeared to be seriously injured.

"So you're okay? Nothing hurts?" I asked again, knowing I was pushing it.

"I'm fine." 

"You want to head back to the condo?" I ask.

"Definitely. Skiing is clearly not my thing." She smiled weakly.

We glided to the end of the hill, where we clicked off the skis. We carried them the short distance to the condo, and she went inside while I put them away in the designated closet outside the condo. I walked in, and she had walked into her bedroom. A few moments later, she emerged in a pair of jeans and a green sweater with a low neckline. My lucky day. I smiled at her silently, and walked into my room and changed. I threw on a pair of blue jeans and a tan turtleneck, and walked back into the living room. She was sitting quietly on the couch, and hadn't moved to turn on the television or anything. She didn't notice me there at first, and I just gazed at her. I could get used to this...

* * * * * *

I was sitting on the couch when I felt his eyes on me. I finally looked over to him and gave a weak smile. I knew he was going to baby me over this falling thing. I was fine, I landed on my ass, I made an idiot of myself but I wasn't injured. I think he knew it, and he just liked to take care of me. Maybe he just knew how much it bothers me and he was trying to drive me insane, but I knew he would persist to ask if I was okay.

"You sure you didn't hurt yourself out there?" He asked. Ugh! I was so sick of him doing this!

"I'm SURE, Mulder! Why do you always do this?" I ask finally, frustrated.

"Do what?" He asked defensively.

"THIS! Worry about me? Treat me like I'm a piece of glass that's going to break if you push it too hard? Haven't I shown you I can handle myself? How long have we been working together, Mulder? Seven years? Don't you realize I can worry about myself?" I didn't realize I was shouting until I finished.

"Wow, Scully, all I did was ask if you hurt yourself because you fell, and you likely could have hurt yourself..."

"No, but," I was stammering now, feeling silly and searching desperately for a point to prove. "You do this a lot. I just, I don't like it. I don't understand why you worry about me like this. I can handle myself, Mulder, and I don't like you implying I can't."

It was his turn to get angry, I suppose.

"Hold on a minute, Scully. When did I imply that? All I did was something *nice*. Now I'm sorry, but I didn't think women dislike it when you do nice things for them. What the Hell do you want me to do when you fall? Laugh? I was doing something *nice*."

I had never felt like such an idiot as I did at that moment. Of course, I wouldn't let on to it, and I wouldn't let him win that easily.

"Look, I just don't like it when your always trying to take care of me..." I trail off.

"Well guess what, Scully, I LIKE taking care of you. That's why I do it!" He's yelling now. "I like taking care of you and I want to take care of you every minute of the day. I want to make sure nothing bad ever happens to you again, I want to protect you from every evil in the world, and I know I can't. I can't all the time, but can't you let me once in a while? Don't you see that I want to? Do you know WHY? Have you figured it out, Agent Scully?"

Half way through his speech, I closed my eyes and tilted my head down. Oh god. Oh god. My breath catches in my throat when I try to answer him.

"No." I answer his question, opening my eyes. My voice came out in a small whisper. I didn't notice the tears building in my eyes until I opened them.

"Because I love you!" He said, still shouting.

Oh my God. He's finally lost it. He can't mean that.

"Mulder, you don't have to--" I begin, but he doesn't give me time. He moves in swiftly and covers my lips with his own. I panic, and freeze up. Soon enough, I realize what's happening and kiss him back, pulling his body as close to mine as I can on the couch. I cling to him, kissing him, never wanting to let go. Mulder loves me. Mulder kissed me. Finally, he backs off of me.

"If you don't feel the same way, you need to tell me right now."

"I love you Mulder... I've always... I'm sorry I.."

He doesn't give me time to apologize, and he kisses me again. Before I know it, I feel him pick me up. He's carrying me! He's got one arm under my knees and the other supporting my back, and he's actually carrying me towards the bedroom. This is surreal, it's ridiculous, he's CARRYING me into the bedroom! I look up at him, about to tell him I can walk, when he meets my gaze.

"Uh-uh, you're going to let me treat you like a princess for just once." He said.

"Don't make a hobby of it, I like my independence." I teased.

He dumped me down on the bed and said, "I think this might change your mind."

All I could think was, you're right, Agent Mulder, it just might.


	3. Chapter Three

* * * * * * * 

About four hours after Scully and I were fighting, I rolled over in bed to find her next to me. I looked at the clock, and realized it was only about 7:00 at night. Our day had gotten an early start, things got fabulous, we wore each other out, and we took a little nap. Nothing in the world could bring me down from this high--nothing. The woman I loved loved me back, and we were laying in bed together, under the sheets. It was dark out now, the snow falling outside. I vaguely remembered how I still needed to make Scully laugh, but it was in the back of my mind after we'd done something that was just a tad more fun than laughing. My stomach grumbled and I realized we hadn't eaten since the morning.

"Hey, Scully, wake up." I whispered quietly, right into her ear.

"Mm, why?" She asked.

"Because I'm hungry, and I want to go get dinner with you." I said.

"It's a little late to ask me out on a date now, Agent Mulder." She teased.

"C'mon, I'm really hungry, we haven't eaten all day." I whined.

"All right, as long as you take me somewhere nice." She agreed.

"Shower and put on something nice, and I'll do the same." I said, and we both finally raise from the bed.

She threw on her bathrobe and wandered into the master bathroom first, while I found something to wear. I settled on black pants and a red turtleneck sweater. I packed a lot of turtlenecks, since it was so cold up here, and they could easily look casual or formal enough for a nice restaurant. As soon as Scully came out of the shower, I scold myself for not killing time and joining her. _Yeah, Fox, you're in it for the time management_... I jumped in the shower after she did and got dressed. I walked out of the room twenty five minutes later to find Dana Scully waiting for me in the living room. Dana Scully as I have never seen her before.

She's wearing a black dress, with a swooping neckline. It hugs her curves and is cut above her knee. I look her up and down, and see her blush a little. Her hair is dried so it curls around her face, and she's wearing red lipstick. Her cross dangles around her neck, catching light and shining. She finally smiles at me, and looks me up and down herself.

"You look absolutely beautiful." I told her, and she blushes again.

"You don't have to say that," She begins.

"No, you look astonishing..." I let out a deep breath.

"Thanks. I packed the dress just in case." she grinned. "You don't look too bad yourself." She said, walking over to me. "Did I ever tell you how sexy I think you look in a turtleneck?"

"No, Scully, you didn't, because if you did I would wear them a lot more often."

* * * * * 

He handed me my coat and led me out into the snow to the car. I suddenly liked the snow again, like I did when I was a kid. I wanted to run around in it, make snow angels with Mulder. In the dress I was wearing and the heals I had on, however, frolicking through the snow is not a wise idea. He drove to the restaurant, and I didn't know how he knew where it was. It was an Italian place, and we got a seat right away. 

He bought me a fabulous dinner, with an expensive wine. I pass up on desert, however, anxious to cuddle up next to Mulder by a fire in the condo. This is amazing, I still can't believe it's happening. Mulder and I are lovers. Finally. Finally, I don't have to wonder or worry or even think, because everything is going to be okay. Mulder and I are lovers. I love him and he loves me, and nothing else matters at this moment. Not the FBI, not the X-Files, not conspiracies, not diseases, nothing. Nothing but Mulder and I.

We arrive back at the condo, and he takes my coat again. I'll let him look out for me for now, I decided. I walked into the kitchen and took out a bottle of wine, thanking Mulder silently for being prepared. I took out two glass flutes, and filled them with the wine. Mulder walked in from putting away the coats, and takes a glass. We sat down on the couch, and he put an arm around me. I never imagined things could really be like this.

"Mulder... Let's light a fire." I said, gesturing towards the fireplace.

"It's easier said than done, but for you..." He trailed off, placing his glass on the coffee table. He walked over to the fireplace and looked at the little framed directions beside it. He followed them all, using the fire-starters that were put there by the hotel.

"Need help?" I asked, sipping the wine on the couch.

"No, I've just about got it." He replied. About five minutes later, there was fire crackling.

"It's beautiful." I smiled.

"You're beautiful." He replied.

"Trying to smooth talk me, Agent Mulder?" I asked.

"Is it working?" 

"I think it may be." I replied, taking another sip of my wine.

"I'm glad." He said. 

"You know, Mulder, I never had any interest in skiing until you asked me to join you up here..."

"Thank you for coming." He smiled.

"Thank you for inviting me." I replied. 

He kissed me again, and I knew it was more than just the wine that made my head spin.

* * * * 

I rolled over and looked at the clock. It was two o'clock in the morning, and the snowy hills outside were dark. I looked at Scully beside me, again, in bed. Again, I realized I hadn't made her laugh yet. I suddenly got the most brilliant idea, a foolproof way to make her laugh as loud as she ever had. I trace my finger along her neck, and whisper into her ear.

"Hey, Scully," I whispered. "Wake up..."

"What time is it?" She mumbled.

"Two in the morning." I smiled.

She turns to face me, and asks, "Why are you waking me up at two in the morning?"

"Because, I have an idea. I promised you fun in the snow, and I want to give it to you."

"The snow? But I'm fine right here." She smiled, throwing her arm over me and moving closer to me.

"Well, we had plenty of fun inside, but I want to do something else. I promise it will be fun. C'mon, get up." I persuaded her.

"Ugh, this better be good, Mulder." She whined.

"Put on something warm." I warned her.

Twenty minutes later, I'm looking at an annoyed Dana Scully. She doesn't look as annoyed after I kiss her chastely and whisper, "You are so wonderful. You woke up in the middle of the night just because I asked you too. I love you for things like that." She smiled at me, and I grabbed her gloved hand. "This is going to be fun. I promise" 

I lead her outside, and throw open the ski locker. I take out the huge toboggan-like sled I had spotted earlier. "Oh, no," she protested with a smile. I just nod and take her hand again, running throw the snow. She chases after me, and I reach a big hill outside the condo. It's silent, since everyone else is asleep.

"So you wake me up," She begins, smiling. "At two in the morning, to come outside and go sledding?" 

"Hey, Scully?" I called from ahead of her.

"Yeah?" 

"Think fast!" I yelled, throwing a snowball at her and hitting her in the shoulder.

"Oh, you are so dead, Mulder." She smiled, running after me and scooping up snow.

She catches up to me and covers me in snow, but I don't mind. Cold is a minor sacrifice for seeing Dana Scully smile like this. She laughed a little, but not the laugh I'm looking for. Not that loud, happy, letting everything else go laugh. I grab to big sled, and with my other hand grab onto her. "C'mon," I said, running up the hill. When I reached a high enough point to ensure a fast ride down, I stopped and looked at her.

"Get in." I said, slightly out of breath from running up the hill.

"Mulder," She began.

"Uh uh, get in." I insist.

She throws her head back and gives me one of her looks, but walks over to the sled while I hold it. She slides in, scooting to the front. I start pushing the sled, running behind it while it gained speed. Then, finally, I jumped in behind her, hardly making it. I threw my arms around her for balance as we went flying down the side of the hill. I started laughing, and so did she. I got to hear my favorite Scully-laugh. The loud, carefree, throw your head back and enjoy life laugh. It made me laugh, and as the sled went flying along we just kept laughing. 

We didn't stop laughing when the sled finally hit a branch and we tumbled out, laying in the snow together. We kept laughing until it hurt, until we couldn't breathe. Until we couldn't laugh anymore. The smiles didn't leave our face, and finally we felt the cold laying there in the snow. I just watched her, her face, never wanting this to end. It was beautiful, and I never wanted to let go of it. Not of her, not her laugh, not her when she's angry or happy or *anything*. She's amazing and I'm never going to let her forget it.

We spend a long time there, until we're too tired to sled anymore. We finally rise back to out feet, and I take her hand. I love knowing that I can take her hand, lead her back to *our* bed. It's so perfect, and I realize I'm going to have to thank to Gunmen profusely for going to that computer convention this weekend. I should thank that jerk ski instructor, and Scully's poor skiing... Who would have thought things could turn out so right when they had seemed to be going so wrong?

We walk back into the warm condo, and I watch Scully shake the snow from her body. How did I live before I told her I loved her? We've been "lovers" for what, not even a day, and I can't imagine things being different all of a sudden. I have all the answers I ever wanted, I have everything I need right here. She catches me staring at her, and stares back. We put our coats away and realize that normal people are sleeping at three in the morning, and decide to be normal for a few hours.

I crawl into bed, amazed I can do so with the woman I love. Under the covers, she cuddles up next to me. I'd always imagined she'd be a cuddler. I hold her close to me, and she looks up into my eyes. She has a smile on her face, and I do too. Of course, there's been a permanent smile on my face since we went into the bedroom the first time.

"It's funny," Scully began. "I was so afraid to tell you how I felt about you. I imagined this vacation would be hell, living with you and not being able to really be with you. It may have been that way if it weren't for how terrible skiing turned out to be."

"Yeah, I guess it was terrible for a reason, huh?"

"Now, if I hadn't been miserable on the slopes, I wouldn't have been nearly as happy in here." She grinned.

"So I guess I should thank you for falling on your ass." I smiled.

"And that ski instructor for slapping it." She joked.

"Hm, now that things are different, I think I'll find him tomorrow and break his legs."

"So you're a protective lover, huh?" Scully asked. Lover. It's still amazing.

"Oh, yeah." I said quietly.

"Mulder? Can you promise me something?" She asked.

"What?" 

"That you won't make me get back on skis for the rest of the vacation."

"I promise. I can think of far better things to do inside, anyway."

"Me too, Mulder. Me too." 

****

AUTHORS NOTES: There's more, I promise. It just keeps getting fluffier. You can blame my boyfriend for that, he's made me a hopeless romantic. Oh, and happy Valentine's day, although I'm posting this on the fifteenth. I hope everyone's Valentine's Day was as wonderful as mine. And if it wasn't, hey ladies, guys are jerks--don't even ask how I managed to catch mine, because he's only half-jerk. They're all at least PART jerk. (Yes, even Mulder. If he were real, that is.) My guy's problem is he hates the X-Files. It's caused quite a few little arguments, I must say. Anywho, he inspires me to be fluffy and romantic and I love him madly, so thanks to him. (Not that I'd EVER let him read this.) 

More coming soon!

Your slave to feedback,

Jillian


	4. Chapter Four

* * * * * * * *

I woke up next to Mulder the next morning, curled up against him. I pulled myself out of the bed, realizing I was hungry. He felt me get up and his eyes fluttered. He mumbled something that sounding like "Morning, Scully." A few minutes after I had walked into the kitchen, he joined me there. I poured two bowls of cereal and we ate breakfast uneventfully. The morning after. I always dreaded this.

"I'm going to hop in the shower." I smiled, and he nodded.

I let the hot water fall on my back as I wondered if we should talk about... This. I mean, what had really changed? We've loved each other for years, we were just acknowledging it now. They say sex changes everything. Would our working relationship be damaged? There was no going back, though, since I'd never be able to leave him behind. I walked out of the shower and wrapped myself in a towel before heading into the bedroom.

I had on about half of my clothes when Mulder walked in. I was startled at first, but remembered I didn't have to cover up around him anymore. He just stood there for a few seconds before he laid out his clothes. I turned to him, and took a deep breath.

"Should we... Talk about this?" I asked.

"Talk about what?" He asked.

"Well, the fact that I'm standing in front of you half naked, for one."

"Scully, don't tell me you're having morning-after regrets." He said, seriously.

"Of course not, Mulder... I just think that maybe we should talk about how this is going to affect work."

"It's not going too. You know just because we're..." He paused. "Dating? Are we dating?" He asked, smiling. I shrugged. "Well, just because we're lovers, there, that sounds more mature... It won't change the way I look at you in the field. I figured you knew that."

"I just wanted to make sure. I don't know, I felt like not talking about it would be irresponsible." I said.

"Don't over-think it, Scully. Don't suck the fun out of it, worrying that it will ruin our working relationship. It won't. It will be separate from work. It *has* to be. We could be separated for fraternizing, you know Kersch is dying for a reason to split us up."

"You're right. So we'll keep it out of the office." I said.

"Okay. No going back now." Mulder smiled.

"No going back." I smiled back at him.

"Take out some warm clothes, Scully. I'm taking you somewhere later on tonight." 

"You promised I wouldn't have to go out in the snow." I whined.

"No, I promised you wouldn't have to put on skis." He replied.

"So where are we going?" I asked.

"It's a surprise. It's outdoors, though, so like I said, dress warm. You'll love it, I promise... It's something romantic."

"You? Romantic? I never knew." I smiled.

"I'm going to try to not be offended, Scully. I'm *very* romantic."

"I didn't mean it in a bad way. I never saw a romantic side of you before, that's all."

"Well you're going to see it on occasion from now on." He smiled.

"I must say, I can't wait." I grinned.

* * * * * * * 

The day progressed along slowly. Scully and I walked over to the Slopeside Bar & Grill, located above the ski lodge. We ordered lunch, and she protested when I wouldn't let her split the bill. I insisted, being that we were on vacation. I knew when we got back to DC, she'd insist on paying for half of all meals eaten during the work day. While we were away, however, I wanted to take care of her, just for a little while.

Being with Scully was unlike being with any other woman in the world. It was different because I was in love with her, and she loved me back. It was different than every relationship I'd ever had... I never had to worry about her cheating on me with another man, and I clearly wasn't being used just for sex. I mean, sure, sex is great, but nobody uses someone for seven years to get some. Of course, she knows I feel the same about her. We don't have to worry about falling out of love, or being left for someone else. All we have to worry about is holding onto each other, and not losing one another to the inevitable... In our line of work, that's more possible than for the rest of the world. Almost everyday there is an opportunity for one of us to be lost forever... 

Even before this vacation, she's been such a major part of my life. My truest friend, my love, my soul mate... I could never survive without her, not after the last seven years. I watch her as we walk back to the condo, and wonder what she's thinking. I selfishly hope it's about me, but what guy wouldn't want to be in Scully's mind?

We spend the day lounging around the condo, making fun of a cheesy Lifetime movie. The plots are always so exaggerated, and the guy is *always* wrong. I checked my watch and noticed it was already almost 6:30. We had to leave the house in fifteen minutes to be on time for my romantic surprise.

"Scully, we should get ready. I want to leave here in fifteen minutes." I told her.

"So you're seriously not telling me where we're going?" Scully asked.

"Seriously, Scully. That's the essence of a surprise." I smiled.

"I don't like surprises." Scully said.

"You just haven't got a really cool surprise lately. I mean, there's a difference between a romantic surprise and a alien colonization type surprise."

"If you say so." She teased, getting up to go change into something warmer. 

I changed as well, and then we put on our shoes and coats. I took her hand in mine, and wondered how it was possible to be so lucky. I never had much of anything to love before Scully. After I lost Samantha, when my parents split up, I didn't believe in love. How could I? My parents were supposed to love each other, but they split up. As a family, we were supposed to love Samantha, but we let them take her... My parents were supposed to love me, but they were too caught up in their own agendas or too wracked with guilt to be good parents. I guess they loved me, but they didn't express it. Not after Samantha was taken. 

I didn't date much in high school. I was set on my studies, so I could get away from my family and all the pain I felt inside. Besides, I didn't know what love was. Sure, I said I loved the girls I dated, but what guy doesn't say that? When I went to college, and I started dating Phoebe, I got involved in the worst relationship of my life. Phoebe was a bitch, plain and simple. She used me, and I fell for it. I thought I loved her, but what I loved was being with someone. She was a woman who told me she loved me, and I wanted so badly to be loved that I fell for her. She didn't care about me, and I knew she didn't by the end of the relationship. When I left to go back to America, she didn't even care. Me leaving was nothing to her.

Then, when I started dating Diana at the academy, I thought I had found someone I really loved. We shared the same job, and we got along well. There was something missing, though. Diana was different than Phoebe, in that Diana did care about me. And maybe at one time, she loved me. The problem with Diana was that everything she did, she did for herself. She didn't care whose side she was on, as long as she came out on top. She left me without thinking about it, because she thought it would be good for her career. She was a better person than Phoebe, but that doesn't make her a good person. She was arrogant, and selfish. She always had been, and I think she realized it. She saved my life, but I don't think it was all self-sacrificial. I'm not quite sure she would have tried to save me if she thought they'd kill her for it. 

There were other women in between, but I didn't even bother to pretend I loved them. None of them compared to Scully. Scully was different. She was nothing like Phoebe or Diana. She was honest, and never compromised her integrity. She was selfless, and everything she did, she did because it was the right thing. She gave up a promising career in medicine to go into the FBI and help people. She gave up a promising career in the FBI to chase conspiracies and aliens with me. Why did she do it? To expose the evils of the world, again, for other people. 

The big difference of all is that nothing is missing between us. We're more than lovers, we're best friends. We both love each other. This feeling... It's nothing I've ever felt before. It's total bliss to know you're in love with the most wonderful woman on the planet (or elsewhere) and that she loves you back. It makes me forget everything--all my terrible problems. Before Scully, I was a self-loathing lunatic. Now, I'm a just a lunatic. I don't hate myself anymore. I finally know what love is.

I realize I haven't said anything the entire car ride. "We're here," I murmur, as I pull into the parking lot for the Cortina Inn. I'm confident that she still has no idea why we are here. I can tell by the look on her face that she's wondering why we went from the condo to an Inn, but she's not getting any hints from me. I take her hand as we maneuver the icy walkway and head inside.

* * * * * * *

What the Hell are we doing at an Inn? We *have* a place to stay already. What on earth is he up to now? I take his hand as we walk towards the front door to avoid falling on my face. The Inn, however confusing to me, is beautiful. It's old fashioned, set back off the road in a wooded area. It's very dark outside, and it's cold. That's Vermont for you at night: dark and cold. He opens the door for me and we step inside.

The Inn is even more charming inside. It's big, and the lobby is beside a large sitting room. There are people sitting around, playing checkers and reading books beside the fire. "I'll be right back," Mulder murmured, walking towards the front desk. I nodded silently, and watched him walk away. I'm still adjusting to being in this kind of a relationship with Mulder. I'm thrilled about it, though, that much is obvious. For a very long time, I've wanted nothing more than to be with him.

I'd been very lonely before this vacation. Earlier on in our partnership, I had friends. I kept them for quite some time, and contrary to popular belief I still have a *few* left. It wasn't friends that I was seeking, though. Mulder has been my best friend for a long time, and we spend time together often. Lately, its been more often than in previous years. Still, I was lonely. It's lonely living all by yourself. I was tired of eating dinner alone almost every night. Of coming home by myself, with nothing to look forward to except a long, lonely bath. I was tired of going to sleep alone, and waking up alone again in the morning. I hadn't woken up next to a man in years. Now, all of that was going to change. Not only would there be a man next to me, it would be Mulder.

Honestly, I was anxious to plunge into a romantic relationship with Mulder. Finally, I had everything I wanted. My past relationships had been healthy, normal, but scarce. There was Marcus, which was a typical high school senior boyfriend type of a relationship. Then I got in way over my head with Daniel. I found out he was married, but I didn't leave right away like I should have. I stuck around, and I'm not quite sure why. When I left for the FBI, he was disappointed in me. I couldn't let him, or anyone else, dictate the direction my life was going in anymore. After him, there was Jack. We were good together, but we also got too busy for one another. Suddenly, there wasn't anything between us anymore. I left the academy, and we ended things.

And now here I was with Mulder. My wandering mind meandered back to the present, and I wondered when Mulder would reveal his big surprise to me. He smiled at the clerk at the desk and walked back over to me. Saying only "Come on, Scully," he placed his hand on the small of my back and guided me along as he had done so many times before. 

We walked down a long hall, until we reached a room with a sign that read 'Reading Room.' I looked around, and saw several couches and chairs, a piano, and a beautiful fireplace. The walls were lined with full bookcases, hence the name of the room. It was empty, but there was a table with hot chocolate set up on it. Nobody else was in the large room except for us. 

"So," I began, looking at Mulder. "You going to tell me why I'm here?"

"I suppose now would be a good time." He smiled, fixing us both some hot chocolate.

"Well?" I coaxed.

"Well, Scully, we're here for a romantic evening event." He smiled.

"Which would be..." I urged him to continue.

"Someone is curious." He teased.

"I have every reason to be. You take me from the condo to another inn. What sense does that make?"

"Inns don't only supply beds you know, Scully. Maybe you ought to get your mind out of the gutter."

"I think it would rather stay there, right beside yours." I smiled.

"You'll see why we're here soon enough." Mulder said. He was so annoying sometimes. "Take in the country atmosphere." He teased, sitting down on the couch in front of the fireplace. 

I sat beside him and said, "You're lucky I don't have my gun, Mulder. I told you, I don't like surprises."

"And I told you I'd change that." He said. After a sip of hot chocolate, he smiled at me. "I feel like I'm stuck inside a game of Clue." 

"How do you mean?" I asked, smiling.

"I think Doctor Scully killed the millionaire, in the Reading Room, with the candlestick." He said, picking up the candlestick on the table in front of us.

I laughed so hard I thought I would spit my hot chocolate out.

Just then, a man walked into the large room. I watched, still confused on why I was here, as he walked over to our side of the room. His boots clunked heavily on the floor, but everyone wore clunky boots in Vermont. Even in the boots Scully had, her feet always seemed cold. Smiling, the man walking over to them introduced himself.

"Hi, folks. My name is Rudy. Are you Mr. Mulder?" He asked.

"Yes, I am. This is Dana." He introduced me. Dana. I didn't think about names. Would he begin to call me Dana now? I would never call him Fox. He doesn't seem like a 'Fox' to me. He's called me Dana a few times before though, when the emotion was high... Would he use it now? He hadn't done so yet.

"Well, if you folks are ready to head outside, we can get going. Everything is all set."

Ah, back outside. Hence the warning to dress warmly. 

As we followed Rudy, I whispered to Mulder. "Will you please tell me--"

"You'll see." He said, opening the door for me as we stepped outside.

We walked along a long cobblestone path, which happened to be rather icy, and I held onto Mulder's arm for balance. That was when I saw it. Two horses, big, white horses, and a sleigh. A horse-drawn sleigh! All that went through my mind was 'How sweet!' and 'How romantic!' I was reduced to a sixteen year old girl who received a rose on Valentines Day, which is unlike me. Then again, I hadn't been romanced in years. I looked up at Mulder, unable to hide the smile on my face.

"Mulder, this is so sweet of you..." I began, not knowing what to say.

Rudy hoped into the front of the sleigh, and I noted the irony that a guy named Rudolph would lead our sleigh through the night. The sleigh was built for about twelve people, and suddenly I wondered why we were the only two people in it. I looked to Mulder, who had led me to the back row of the sleigh.

"Mulder, how did you manage to get the sleigh all to ourselves?" I asked.

He took something out of his pocket, and showed me twelve sleigh ride tickets.

"You bought out the entire sleigh? Mulder, you didn't have to, other people around would've been fine..."

"No, Scully. I wanted to do something romantic."

"And it was no difficulty to pay for all those tickets? Mulder, I know how much we make..." I began, assuming this couldn't be too cheap.

"My parents left me a lot of money, Scully. One thing they were good for." He said sarcastically. "And there's nobody I'd rather spend it on."

I grinned, realizing I haven't felt as happy as I did that week in years. It was surreal, in a way, sitting in a horse-drawn sleigh with Mulder. Sure, we've loved each other for years... But I was never sure we'd do anything about. In fact, I was afraid we wouldn't. At the same time, I was also afraid we *would.* Afraid it would destroy the precious friendship and working relationship we had all along. Now that we've taken that step... It's clear to me that very little has changed. We've always felt this way about each other, but now we've got the courage to acknowledge it.

The horses starting off into the woods startled me. The sleigh jerked forward, and I lost my balance a little. I let out a loud laugh, grasping Mulder's arm. He turned to me, laughing as well. His eyes burned into mine; all of that passion he'd once focused on so many other things, focused on me. It was amazing. Nobody ever made me feel the way Mulder had these past few days. I knew when we went back to work, he wouldn't have as much opportunity as he did here to make me feel so loved, so special. I knew he was relishing it, before we had to go back to our professional relationship 50 percent of our time together. 

The sleigh was complete with sleigh-bells, that jingled through the forest as the horses began their journey. Mulder covered both of us with the blanket that had been waiting for us in the sleigh.

"You cold?" He asked.

"No, Mulder. I haven't noticed the cold at all." I said, so caught up in the moment I'd forgotten I was rather chilly. The blanket warmed me up, but it was Mulder's beside me that made me forget the cold.

"Isn't it beautiful up here, Scully?" Mulder asked, as the horses slowed down a bit in the woods. 

"Incredibly," I said, taking in my surroundings. 

I was startled, and thrown off balance, again, as the horses began to speed up down a bumpy incline. "Oh!" I exclaimed, bouncing up off of my seat for a moment. I broke out into laughter when I noticed that Mulder was also gripping the edge of the sleigh as the horses raced through the woods. I had assumed these things were smooth and slow, but I was a bit mislead in that assumption. 

The trail traversed through the woods, inclines and declines meeting us along the way. The horses pulled us through the snow, and Mulder and I couldn't suppress laughter for much of ride. Fun. God, he was the only one who made me have fun anymore. Honestly, every fun thing I've done in quite some time is associated with Mulder. Sure, I've gone out with old friends from college and had a good time occasionally in the past few months, but Mulder was a different kind of fun. He was the amusing joke that lightened up a dark case, the smirking face who both annoyed me and made my day. How many times have I had to try to remained annoyed with him when I want to burst into laughter? When he takes me on the silliest of cases, with circus freaks and the like. When we we're sitting in a room with a gay couple, protecting them from a monster. When we we're hunting ghosts. Going undercover as a married couple to take down a *garbage monster.* Chasing around the 'Great Mutato' and taking him to see Cher... Who else could make any of these things fun? Of course, there were also the special after-case things we'd been doing lately... Exchanging gifts on Christmas Eve (*after* a ghost hunt)... And I'll never forget Mulder teaching me to hit a baseball... Hips before hands.

The sleigh pulled to a stop in the middle of the woods for a moment, and Rudy looked back to us.

"I usually give 'em a rest about here." He smiled.

Mulder and I nodded silently. Rudy got down from his seat to check on the horses out front.

"So, do you like it?" Mulder asked.

"Of course I do, Mulder. It's so fun, and very romantic. I admit, you're more romantic than I had believed."

"I told you so, Scully."

"You know, you won't get away with telling me you told me so as soon as we get back to work."

"I know. I like your stubbornness, Scully. It just goes to show how you never give up."

"You're equally as stubborn, Mulder." I smiled.

"Well, now I don't know if it's an insult or a compliment." He smiled back.

There was a short moment of silence, before he shifted slightly and met my gaze.

"Scully, thank you. I don't think I've ever told you this, or ever thanked you for it, but you've changed my life. You turned me around, pulled me out of a self-loathing downward spiral... I didn't care about anything but my work before you, and now, you're my everything. You went from being someone who I thought was working against me to the only one who I know isn't. You saved me, Scully. So many times, in so many ways."

"Mulder," I began, closing my eyes to take in all that he had said. "I remember the first few times we worked together... You were arrogant, you were irrational... I never imagined it would work. Not until a few cases later, when I really began to see who you were. Slowly, I felt myself falling for you, pretending not to notice it myself. Every time I thought I'd lose you, I would become so afraid that you'd never know what you really meant to me. Even when you pissed me off Mulder, which was very often, and always will be, I couldn't stay mad at you. I'll never be able too."

"Good. Because I've got a lot of screwing up left in my life, and I can't have you leaving me when I piss you off." He grinned.

"Never, Mulder. I'd never leave you. Not if I could help it."

He gently pushed a bit of hair away from my face, tucking it behind me ear. Gently, and ever so slowly, he moved his lips down to mine. It was a short, chaste, loving kiss. The kind of kiss that made you feel really beautiful, worth a million dollars. Mulder always knew when to treat me like a work of art, and when to treat me like his partner. Well, maybe not *always.* But most of the time.

What a wonderful vacation this had turned out to be. What if I had told him no? Would none of this had ever happened? Would I be sitting at home for yet another night, wondering, thinking of him? It doesn't matter now. Nothing mattered to me at that moment, nothing but Mulder and I. Rudy jumped back into the sleigh, the horses ready to keep going.

We rode off into the night together, never looking back once. 

.end.

AUTHORS NOTES: Wow! This was ultra-fluffy. Almost fluffy to the point of apology! But, I really did all of this stuff in Vermont and I thought it could make a fun fic, so I did it. And yeah, it is *really* fluffy, but I feel that people need that once in a while. Who doesn't love fluff? Oh, and Rudy really *was* my sleigh driver. The Cortina Inn is a real place, where they really do give horse drawn sleigh rides. And yes, they do stop to give the horses a rest. It wasn't just so they could have a moment of privacy. 

Anyway, I hope you liked it. Let me know here at the site or by sending me an e-mail at JILLIBEAN@aol.com. Oh, and thanks to Agent Balinski, by kind of sort of beta reader, who I run everything by before posting it. 

Jillian


End file.
